Wednesday, June 30, 2004
Can I Drive You Home
Sitting alone
pondering the day's event
thinking of the love
that came and went
Pain was overwhelming
I had nowhere to run to
my heart forced me to look up
and standing there was you
We shared our pain
shared a laugh or two
there was no use fighting
love hit me and you
Time was silent
thoughts began to roam
you looked in my eye
Can I drive you home
I asked you in
we awkwardly made our way
talked about our hurt
defenses fading away
Visited the past
validated what was true
couldn't hide it anymore
love came barging through
With nothing but love
hanging on our sleeve
erasing the denial
we tried to believe
With one touch of you
and my touch in return
we could no longer put out the fire
that wanted so desperately to burn
You swept me in your arms
undressed me head to toe
filled me with love
I thought I'd never know
Wrapped in your clutch
all night long
It felt too damn good
to say it was wrong
We lay in each other's arms
not wanting our feelings to again roam
our hearts fell in love with the words
Can I drive you home
My Favorite Mistake
I tried to fight it
tried to let you go
but feelings overwhelmed
love began to grow
I denied as long as I could
successful for awhile
but I never felt complete
until I seen your daily smile
I tried to forget
the need I felt for you
I didn't want to accept
the feelings I had were true
I forced myself to move on
it was just a night of lust
there is no built up love
no years of love and trust
But as days went by
and all I thought of was you
Remembering how you felt
the wonderful place you took me to
I can't remember a time
where I forgot pain for awhile
I couldn't remember the last time
I felt good enough to smile
I couldn't remember when
there was someone I wanted to run to
It was then my heart realized
it was falling in love with you
Denial started to fade
no matter how hard I tried
and when I couldn't see you
my eyes automatically cried
I would long for your touch
hoping for just a glance
wondering silently
if we really had a chance
You showed me your love
it was something your heart wanted too
the best thing I ever did
was let myself love you
You're My Soul
You're what makes me breathe
makes my heart beat
helps me keep fighting
not giving into life's defeat
You hold my body up
when all I want to do is fall
and when I feel so low
you force me to walk tall
You help me wake up
and want to face the day
injecting strength into me
not letting weakness sweep me away
You brought me back to life
You're what makes me feel whole
you make up the very best in me
you are the life in my soul
Your Taste
We can't get enough
we need more
from the bedroom
to the kitchen floor
Lay in bed all day
spoon through the night
lips constantly touching
bodies pressed air tight
We have to be touching
can't stand to be apart
got to have the constant rush
of the flutters in our heart
Touch, taste, make love to me
keep the fire burning within
don't ever let me go
I want your taste forever on my skin
X-Files
I look in your eyes
it all seems possible
when you hold me close
I feel indestructible
I hear your word
telling me I'm so much more
you make me see
what the daily fight is for
I see your smile
it all makes sense
I feel worth the time
just being in your presence
When you hold my hand
I feel it is okay to be me
just being with you
is what completes me
New Life, New Love
You're all I've wanted
all I've longed for
when my heart is with you
I dont hurt anymore
I was searching forever
and I found it in you
now my heart beats with hope
that I will make it through
I wake up with renewed joy
the want to get up and breathe
you give me the reason
to find strength to believe
You breathe life into me
help me fight my way through
my heart beats happy
because I've fallen in love with you
Lily Kay
(Our Little Girl)
I never seen you
but you still have a face
maybe you're better off
never having suffered in this place
I will always wonder
what it felt like to hold you
if you would of had my eyes
maybe my thick hair too
You were only a thought
for just a little while
but to your father and I
you gave us that time limited smile
You will never be forgotten
or just put in our vault of memory
you were a part of us and our love
we will carry you in our heart Lily.
Good-Bye Hayley
Good-Bye to you
There's more words to say
and I don't understand
why you took them away
Good-Bye to you
I wish I had your hand to hold
it used to warm my heart
now your hand is cold
Good-Bye to you
you couldn't fight anymore
I wish I could of helped you
see life is worth fighting for
Good-Bye to you
I've lost my best friend
I still don't understand
why the only way out, was the end
High On Air
I want to reach
to the top of the sky
let the clouds tell me
it'll be alright
I want to sail
through the breezy air
let the wind say
life will soon be fair
I want to fly
with birds on high
they'll sing to me
I no longer have to cry
I want to jump
to the midnight moon
let it whisper to me
you'll be happy soon
No More Mischief
We toilet papered the neighbors house
then rode our bikes through the cornfield
complained for weeks about the cuts and scrapes
but laughed about it when they all healed
We would meet at the corner streetlight
when the clock struck midnight
took a ride home in a cop car
but it was worth our first kisses that night
We conspired together one night
snuck into the biggest snob's bag
the next day the whole town could see
her little undies as the new park flag
We dated our first set of brothers
we thought we had the perfect plan
but then came along two busty blondes
hope they liked the dead fish in their van
Eighteen with the world to explore
so what did we decide to do
walk through the Kmart parking lot
soaking every car lock with super glue
Twenty, both with babies in the womb
time to grow up and take responsibility
so when our old biology teacher's house was egged
we stood up and said that was we
Almost thirty now, where did time go
we can't say we didn't enjoy our prime
there is so much trouble left to get into
but it's not fun anymore without my partner in crime
Shout
I reach out for you
but there's nothing there
I can't go on like this
pretending we don't care
I need you by my side
I dont want to stand alone
we belong together
no matter secrets known
I dont want stolen moments
I want every minute of your day
we have to seize the moment
precious time is slipping away
The time keeps on passing
and our love only grows
our hearts are in love
and I don't want to care who knows
Deep Thoughts
I wake up thinking of you
go to sleep with a picture of your face
your I love you's make me tremble
your kiss makes my heart race
You consume my being
my time is nothing without you
I want to always be in your arms
swim in the passion of you
I replay every touch
every memory we've made
try to capture your every thought
feel every touch you've laid
I want you lost in me forever
I don't want to ever not feel you
this love has reached unforgettable
I'll never stop loving you
I Miss You
I miss you
with every beat
the words I love you
our body heat
I miss you
the feel of your face
the wrapping of your arms
taking me to forbidden place
I miss you
touch of your hand
the smooth feel
of your gold band
I miss you
what our love stands for
I need you
I wont hide it anymore
In Dreams
I played our song
counting down the hour
until I could feel
your heated shower
My mind would wander
with thoughts of you
fighting the urge
to just run to you
I think of the memories
we've already made
tried to feel your touch
that your hands have laid
Dont want to come back
to the tune of reality
because I dont want to feel
what it's like without you here with me
Can't Stay Away
We need patience
take our time to grow
hide our passion
so no one will know
Play it safe
so we can be one day
keep it quiet
so it can't be taken away
One step at a time
dont walk too fast
we have to do this
so this can last
Take it nice and slow
that is what our heads say
but our love filled hearts
just can't stay away
Always There For Me
The room goes dark
I'm gasping for air
looking to see
if your blue eyes are there
Straining for breath
the room spinning round
I call out your name
but I push out no sound
I reach for the phone
trying to get to you
but my strength runs out
my last thought was of you
I wake up to bright light
a cold and sterile place
you breathed the life back into me
when I looked up and seen your face
New Love
I never knew love
could feel this way
I never knew my heart
could be so swept away
Then along comes you
opening my door
to love I didn't think
I could feel anymore
You gave me hope
that love can be true
I held my doubts
until there was you
You made love real
now I understand
so now my heart
is in your hand
You Are My Everything
I sit myself down
try not to think of you
but the more I try
the more i think of you
I can see your stare
the funny face you always make
when you show your disappointment
and I feel my heart slowly break
I can see your smile
lighting up my inside
it's what lets me know
I no longer have to hide
I can see you in my sight
scrunching up your freckled nose
the face only I could love
chilling me from my head to my toes
I can feel your touch
rushing against my skin
making me wonder about
all the bliss my heart is in
I can hear your soft words
whispering I love you
why is my heart feeling
I can't live without you
I can see us together
making a life of our own
I think I'm starting to feel
the greatest love I've ever known
I think about the last hours
and the love your thought did bring
my heart beats with your love
you are my everything
Tears In The Rear View Mirror
I held her hand,
chased away her fear.
Wrapped my arms around her,
soaking up her many tear.
I kissed her forehead.
ran my fingers through her hair.
Kept on reassuring her,
that I will always be there.
I held her tight,
I didn't let go.
Said, "I love you."
She replied, "please don't go."
"I have to leave,
He'll be home soon.
I long to keep holding you,
under the glowing moon."
"I know you have to leave,
convince my heart too,
You're the only happiness,
I can hang on to."
"We can't get caught,
but this is not the time to hide,
I wish I could hold you,
cure the hurt inside."
"I'll stay baby,
I promise, I wont leave.
I will risk everything,
if will help you grieve."
"No baby, no,
let's not get caught.
We're so close now,
for all we have fought."
A little kiss on her head,
lips tied for many minutes more.
Hands stay locked,
until I close the car door.
She smiles through pain,
trying to prove she'll be ok.
But my heart still drops,
knowing I have to drive away.
I drop my head in pain,
pain I carry for her heart.
Knowing I have to drive,
to another night of being apart.
I drive slowly, telling myself,
that our love will soon be nearer.
But my eyes and heart can't forget,
her tears in the rear view mirror.
Run To You
I want to run to you
feel you in my clutch
wrap myself in you
feel the heat of your touch
I want to run to you
look deep into your eye
feel your hand on my face
sit under non judging sky
I want to run to you
hear your sweet word
press your thin lip
try to calm passion stirred
I want to run to you
forget my held down ties
just swim in your body
stop these longing cries
My Eyes Are Burning
My eyes are burning
from the tears that drop
the pain is erupting
I just want it all to stop
I try to wipe the tears
but the sting remains
I try to remove the knife
but nothing removes the blood stains
I can still hear the words
that pure evil had said
i hear my world crumble
inside my scattered head
My face is drowning
my heart breaking in two
the words tumble in my head
do I still have you?
My Heart Is With You
My heart hurts so bad
I want to run to you
but it's the very reason
for the pain I'm going through
I know you would help
tell me it will be okay
brush away my tears
try to love the pain away
I want to curl into you
let you hold my fear
shield my vulnerability
soak up my flooding tear
I know it isn't right
my head keeps telling me
but my heart is being stubborn
and you are where it wants to be
I Hate Myself For Loving You
tell me to stop
take it away
the love I feel
my need to stay
lock it away
forget I care
realize it's lust
that actually lie there
quiet down
don't beat so fast
you damn heart
it just wont last
move on
there's more to hang onto
i hate myself
for loving you
Nightmare On Agency
Don't make me go to bed
I don't want to see his face
I want to remember
the bloodless smile on his face
Don't make me dream
erase my conscious memory
don't let the horror
take over me
Don't make me remember
the death in his eye
don't make me wake up
in a sweating cry
Don't make me fall asleep
i don't want to go back there
i cant watch him die again
take away the nightmare.
Welcome Back
it was sealed
band aid on tight
memories locked away
no trace of that night
nice and clean
no blood trace
horror in my pocket
smile on my face
walked straight ahead
wasn't even sore
danced with freedom
no burden anymore
band aid RIPPED off
wound open to despair
bleeding uncontrollably
welcome back to the nightmare
its what i get
for loving you
i was wrong
and must suffer through
i went too far
crossed forbidden line
went after taken goods
took for granted what was mine
now i will see consequence
laid before my feet
taste the bite of hell
because I gave into lusting heat
handed down punishment
for my blazoned sin
my selfish heart deserves
the hell I'm in
Hot Damn
I feel your breath on my neck
your fingertip deep inside
tongues interlocking
soft whistling moans are cried
You caress my face
my hands run through your hair
passionate thrust
as we lock into our stare
Sweat drops trickle down
falling on my bare skin
I can feel you shaking
as you explode within
We tightly clutch
pleasure pulsates through
lips barely touch
as I moan for you
Our breath is heavy
lips interlock once more
down the neck and thigh
my body moans encore
Wrapped in each other
love being held so tight
love exploded
inside both of us tonight
Thinking Of You
I lose my breath
my heart skips a beat
whenever my skin
is wrapped in your heat
My hands tremble
my body shakes
whenever I'm swarmed
in your body quakes
My eyes dance
my whole body quivers
whenever I swim
in your climaxed shivers
My lips shake
my love screams
I love you so much
to you baby, sweet dreams.
Crash Into Me
My legs wrap around you
you crash into me
I can feel the skin on skin
deep inside of me
Chest upon chest
thrust upon thrust
pushes of love
and a little twist of lust
Small beads of sweat
trickle on our lip
we steady the crashing
with heated hand on hip
My mouth in dry moan
heat taken over me
I want your love
to stay inside of me
Thank You For Loving Me
You grab my hand
hold my fear in your clutch
my fingers tremble
feeling like years since we touched
You caress my cheek
whisper on the side of my face
your thin lips soak up
my tear's fallen trace
You craddled my heart
made love to me all night
I woke up to feel your arms
holding me in the morning light
Huddled in your arms
it's the safest I'll ever be
how can my heart thank you...
thank you for loving me.
| Peg Kay \\ 6/30/2004 |
***********
Friday, June 25, 2004
I Want To Thank You
(I Member)
I forgot how it felt
to wear a smile on my face
fear and dread lingered
taking it's place
I forgot how it felt
to laugh out loud
I thought my laughter
was no longer allowed
I forgot to see the sun
close my eyes and soak it in
I was buried in the dark
afraid to let the ray in
I forgot to smell the flowers
none of mine ever did bloom
My heart was supposed to be sheltered
locked alone in my room
I forgot to hear the wind
whistling through my hair
to feel the freedom in its breeze
I was trapped in painful air
I forgot how it felt to hear the words
that made me feel good inside
I thought I amounted to nothing
ashamed of me all I could do is hide
I forgot how good it felt
to wake up and be happy
I always wanted to close my eyes again
there was nothing in the day for me
I forgot how good it felt
to be in loving arms so tight
to feel the safety swarming me
on lonely summer night
I forgot how loved I could feel
to always know I wasn't alone
didn't think I was deserving
it's all I've ever known
I forgot how loved I could feel
all that letting love in could do
I forgot how much love I could feel
until my heart stumbled upon you
| Peg Kay \\ 6/25/2004 |
***********
Saturday, June 19, 2004
Moving On
Now I walk away
not knowing what to say
after your words have fallen
and taken my comfort away
I inch out the door
not in love anymore
filled with hate inside
my feelings bruised and sore
I step out of your life
no longer a devoted wife
trying to forget the years
of pain filled strife
I stroll the day of old
little lonely and cold
telling myself it will be ok
without a hand to hold
| Peg Kay \\ 6/19/2004 |
***********
Midnight Kiss
Laying in your lap
crying on your knee
trying your best
to try and comfort me
We resisted temptation
so many times before
but this night is different
we can't fight it anymore
I look up at you
you caress my face
wipe away the tears
that have left their trace
Our foreheads fall
we are now skin to skin
trying to ignore
the passion burning within
The timing isn't right
or so they may say
but this is our moment
I wont let them take it away
You move in slowly
our eyes meet once more
the fire burns hotter
singeing our body core
Your hand is on my cheek
I place my hand on you
we lean forward slow
and our lips follow through
Our body tingles
our tongues intertwine
my hand runs through your hair
your body presses against mine
Our lips curl and quiver
it's a feeling I wouldn't miss
I wish we could feel it forever
the love in midnight kiss
| Peg Kay \\ 6/19/2004 |
***********
Sunday, June 13, 2004
Blood On My Hands
I had a picture in my head
a picture that was easier to see
but now my long running denial
is coming back and haunting me
I pushed your face so far back
that the blood disappeared
and the sound of your dying voice faded
erasing all that my heart feared
I didn't feel the grasp of your hand
or the dripping blood in your squeeze
Your last I love you's floated away
becoming one with the midnight breeze
I pretended there was founding peace
even though my heart still didn't understand
I was selfish in wanting to move on
I wear your blood on my hand
| Peg Kay \\ 6/13/2004 |
***********
Thursday, June 10, 2004
Tonite
I can hear your voice
ring through my head
I try to wrap myself
in the words you said
I reach for you
but you're not there
I try to imagine being locked
in the heat of your stare
I try to feel your arms
holding me tight
anything I can do
to stop these tears tonite
I want to run to you
even though I know it's wrong
I dont want to let go
these feelings are too strong
I want my head of morals
to forget what is right
I want to run to you
make love to you all night
I want to wrap myself in you
forget all we're tied to
I wish our hearts were free
so my heart could be with you
| Peg Kay \\ 6/10/2004 |
***********
Wednesday, June 09, 2004
I Don't Want To Quit
I open my eyes
to another day
I want to close them again
make the pain and fear go away
It's my only peace
when I lay my weary head
no fear of loss
no sense of dread
The sun peers through my eye lids
no more pretending to sleep
force myself out of bed
forget my worn out weep
Only eighteen more hours
until I feel peace and quiet
give me the strength today
to fight off the urge to quit
Taking A Step Further
I know it's wrong
what's brewing between me and you
I know I have so much
I shouldn't need to run to you
Touching is forbidden
but we can't keep our hands away
our hearts are fighting
but are about to give way
In all of our confusion
all that we will lose or fade away
we're our only happiness
in each other's day
We know this is wrong
vows have been broken
but now my heart knows
there is love in my words spoken
Love For Him
I'm trying to remember
life when it was still
I can take the endless fear
and of the pain I've had my fill
I think back to the day
when I looked for something to do
life seemed so boring
I seemed to just sail through
I wish for time to pass
hoping an end is in sight
something to build hope on
that there will be healing light
I dream of the glorious day
when I can say it's still once more
when love for him is all that is asked of me
and I wont have to watch him hurt anymore
My Three Sons
Every night I lay my head
the days events roll through me
the one thing I dwell on
is you my precious three
Dylan got in trouble at school
so the talk was in full blare
I wonder if he heard me
or just pretended while I was there
Brandon colored on the wall
for the third time that day
he cried crocidile tears
when I took the crayons away
Tyler cried at a touch
tears coming with every sound
I wondered if I was comforting
or if he'd rather not have me around
Was I too mean
did I not seem caring enough
was my point given and taken
was mommy too rough
I ponder every correction
every punishment I did supply
Did I do what was best for you
did you still see my love for you in my eye
I worry myself sick
to the point I can't sleep
am I the mom you need and deserve
I lay my head in unsure weep
Without any warning
more thoughts creep in
my mind hits replay
and you three are the subject again
Dylan sat down beside me
commented that Brandon was crazy
I burst into a jiggling laugh
when he said he must of gotten it from me
Brandon tried to quietly sneak by
red from head to toe
when I said young man what did you do
he explained he was just making me jello
Tyler needs a diaper change
cried at the disturbance I lay
so a shower for me came
and a sneaky grin he would soon display
As I look back and think
how much I wanted to pull out my hair
I wipe my tired eyes on a drained face
yet a smile was still there
Life can be so hectic
our house is a circus, I can't deny
everything you three do, good or bad
brings the twinkle in my eye
I know a house of peace and quiet
wont happen for quite awhile
but there's peace in knowing you three
will put me to sleep every night with a smile
Dylan's Warm Devotion
I hear your boisterous giggle
smiles shine on my face
you throw your protective word
when someone tries to step into my place
I hear your words speak softly
"you are my mother nature"
my heart beats a soft sigh
my tears begin to stir
I feel overwhelming warmth
as we lay curled up in a chair
I feel we could conquer the world
by just giving in to your sweet stare
I see your blue eyes dancing
whenever I say motherly love will never bend
we've been through the best and worst of times
Dylan, you are my best friend
Brandon's Healing Love
I see you smile
all my fears melt away
my weakened strength
finds a way through the day
I hear you laugh
I can't help but laugh too
the heartache I was traveling
seems easier to walk through
I hear your giddy words
my heart jumps with joy
the frustration wrapping me up
is pulled away by you my little boy
I feel you grab my hand
I can feel the compassion you're made of
mommy's sad heart can't help but smile
Brandon, you heal my hurt with your love
Smile Again Tyler
I see it stretch for miles
it opens the day to new light
overtakes the cloudy haze
makes gloomy hours seem so bright
It can happen in a second
for no reason at all
it picks this heart up
whenever it takes a stumbled fall
It opens up pathways
that seem barricaded forever
it makes this mouth not able to speak
the small word of never
When the pain overwhelms
and I feel I can't be stronger
I turn to look at you
Smile again, Tyler
| Peg Kay \\ 6/09/2004 |
***********
